I want to want----

Change.
Change is something I should be used to by now. It just seems all my life,  I had to adjust to change.
I am having trouble accepting change. I mean change is what I wanted.
I fing it hard to believe that my roommate have graduated and left to start a new life.
I find it hard it to believe that I am senior.
Honestly why do I feel the way i do? Its not like I didn't know that this was going to happen.
    Ha!- I guess things don't actually become a reality until they happen right?  I cant be the only person that feels and thinks this way.
Change!
At this moment change is not working for me.  I want my roommates back. I want the feeling of abandonment gone. I want the feeling of change to seem easy and effortless. I want to not feel like I did want the change to happen. I want to want to accept the changes that are happening in my life.
 Do I really have a choice?